Seasonal Affective Disorder is with me again. On a sunny day like this one I can manage but on a gray day, I can barely tolerate myself. I turn on every light in the office including Christmas lights and a light board on one wall. I take the full doses of St. John's wort and Vitamin D-3.
The two weeks I was in the South my mood improved with the extra daylight and warmth. I walked on the beach and felt fine, but now I am back in the cold and snow of the Wisconsin winter.
When SAD sets in, I cannot write, I cannot organize tours, I cannot think. On these days, I try to get some housework done, make some soup, or answer some e-mails. I take long naps.
I convince myself I am sick. This year I've convinced myself that I am on my way to a stroke. Surely the carotid artery is blocked. The signs are all there. I will collapse and no one will find my body because I have no friends at all. Or I will survive and live in poverty with my mind and body paralyzed. It all seems so obvious to me, no matter how Gary tried to talk me out of it. There is no logic to SAD.
We are in the middle of February and I know that at the beginning of March it will all be over. I'll forget all about the impending stroke, my friends will be my friends again, and I will be my cheerful self for ten months.
The two weeks I was in the South my mood improved with the extra daylight and warmth. I walked on the beach and felt fine, but now I am back in the cold and snow of the Wisconsin winter.
When SAD sets in, I cannot write, I cannot organize tours, I cannot think. On these days, I try to get some housework done, make some soup, or answer some e-mails. I take long naps.
I convince myself I am sick. This year I've convinced myself that I am on my way to a stroke. Surely the carotid artery is blocked. The signs are all there. I will collapse and no one will find my body because I have no friends at all. Or I will survive and live in poverty with my mind and body paralyzed. It all seems so obvious to me, no matter how Gary tried to talk me out of it. There is no logic to SAD.
We are in the middle of February and I know that at the beginning of March it will all be over. I'll forget all about the impending stroke, my friends will be my friends again, and I will be my cheerful self for ten months.
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